The Cable Guy

So today, our cable TV service Team Member made a "courtesy call" to make sure that we're happy with the service. Only a cynic would note the phone call came after the contract period was finished, and now being Free Agents we can sign up with some one else, if we've a mind to do so.

Was I happy with the service? "No". Really? Why not? Coz we're paying over a hundred bucks a month and still having to go down to the video store and hire something worth watching - although our cable service provides access to over 40 different stations, including six movie channels.

And then, not only do they show rubbish on the channels we are paying for, they also want us to pay them even more money for the "premium" movies. "Premium" in this case translates to movies that people probably wouldn't mind watching.

No, of course I'm not happy. Will this be feedback be conveyed to the appropriate personnel? "But of course!" And which personnel would that be? Unfortunately the telephone line seemed to have dropped out at that point.

Gee, I hope the telco Team Member makes their curtesy phone call soon to see if I'm happy with their service.

Not too long ago, I was awarded a great honor - I was appointed the Mystic Archives Librarian of the Dark Brotherhood. Yet another honorary position; you don't get paid for having fun. Apparently.

If you're not a FaceBook subscriber, this (at the moment) may mean nothing to you. However, if you're a librarian, you will no doubt be shortly rushing off to research the Dark Brotherhood. If you're in the second group (the librarians), remember that I'm only the librarian, and not responsible for the Dark Brotherhood's past activities.

Part of my virtual duties includes regular interaction with the library's patrons. No, you can never escape, even in cyberspace. But the question was posed to the other members "What would you do if you were stuck in the Dark Ages?"

Geez ... as the Librarian of the Dark Brotherhood, obviously I'd use the time to catch up on the cataloguing backlog; I sure as heck don't have the time to do it at the moment, what with having to slave over a hot keyboard 24/7.

OK, I don't *have* to be 24/7 at the keyboard, but if I leave the 'net for anything other than the absolutely necessary, who knows what critical information I might miss out on? And THEN what am I going to do if a library user comes and asks me something - in my capacity as The Font of All Knowledge and The Keeper of the Toilet Key - what am I going to do? Break into a soft-shoe shuffle and hope they back quietly away and never come back again. Sure, that's always worked in the past, but eventually folk are going to expect a little service from The Librarian at some stage ...

And today I did shelving ...

No, not as in "put the books on the shelves" ... as in "unpack the metal frames, brackets and shelves, get a screwdriver (and a big mallet) and assemble them". And THEN put the books on the shelves.

The final result looks great, but it's still not something I'd like to have to do every day - or even every month, year, gig, lifetime ...

So we went from this (left hand side pictures) to that (right hand side pictures).












The colour/color change can be credited to either an innate artistic flare, or to photographic incompetance. You choose ...

76 Trombones in the Grand Parade?

The Street Parade for Blacktown City Festival was inspirational, in many unimagined ways. As each of the 'floats' and groups went past, an overwhelming desire to sign up with the Scouts was quickly followed by wanting to learn the bagpipes, join the Emergency Service volunteer brigades, take up gymnastics, and - I swear this was true albeit only for a few fleeting moments - learn Punjabi.

Mind you, I don't know why each and every vehicle with claxton and/or sirens had to give full voice only when at the closest possible distance from my ears. And why every human tank had to make sure they were walking at inverse warp speed in front of me. Or maybe it only seemed that way? Nah. There must have been a huge meeting somewhere last night, where my photo was distributed and an orchestrated complex set of maneuvers was planned and executed with great precision. Those of you who are thinking that it's just the nicco withdrawal talking better not let me hear you.

Highlight of the day was most probably having a 'chat' with our state Premier (sort of like the US equivalent of governor, but with less visible security). Particularly since I was able to provide my personal gratitude for his kind donation to our school library last year. Mind you, he did seem a little lost for words when I casually dropped the fact that the library budget was once again completely depleted, and less than half way through the year ...

And the stocktake begins ...

Yep, tomorrow stocktake ("inventory") starts for the Non-Fiction location. Having spent the last 4 months culling/weeding/deselecting, it's down to a mere 7K-ish volumes. Five days, 2 people ... hmmm. With one person scanning and the other screen-checking (with regular swapping under OHS), that's only 1400 books/movements per day, on and off shelves.

Over a five hour period (six hours, less 20 minutes morning break and 40 minutes lunch break), that's 280 per hour, or 4 per minute. But allowing for an average of one in ten resources - which was about the going rate for Fiction last year - having a problem that will require approximately 5 minutes to correct (eg catalog error, incorrect spine label, invalid barcode) that's an additional 140 books x 5 minutes work time. That's only another 12 hours work, or a little over 2 additional days.

If the equipment doesn't fail, the network doesn't go down (two power surges in the afternoon on last Friday), no one stops for any reason, like they die or something ...

Memorable Words?

Today is the anniversary of the patenting of the rubber band. At the time, it was (apparently) said that the innovation would mean the end of string. This is true, I'm not making it up.

As usual, there will be The Doubters, to whom I would say you are quite free to research this for yourself. I would only ask that you use an authoritative source, check for currency and lack of bias, and remember to reference your source.

Hmmm ... I wonder who will spot the deliberate error in the above :-)

So, how was *your* day?

This morning started off well, with three hours x 2 goodly folks clearing an enormous backlog of accessioning. Then things started going pear-shaped. The standard back-up procedure 'hung', was remotely 'solved', and the morning's work was completely lost to the system. So tomorrow, we get to do all the work again.

A rainy lunchtime meant a very busy library; borrowing was less than usual, with crowd control becoming first priority. But it was the two men with clip-boards measuring things was a much greater concern - particularly when it came to light that they were looking at what part of the library was expendable. A handicapped toilet had to be constructed, and where else would you put one except in an upstairs area with no adjacent sewerage plumbing? The library was an obvious choice. Not. Being as how the library is 3 classrooms with the walls removed, with one third of the created space taken up with 'administration' type area, one third with resource storage, and one third with reader/learner space, of course the other third could become a handicapped toilet.

A student altercation consumed the rest of the work day; and that didn't even consider the amount of paperwork still to be completed. Resolution was 'not yet reached'.

Then it was off to the hairdresser's in preparation for tomorrow's school photographs. When my spectacles fell in half after being dropped from a very small height. Not to mention the fact that it was raining when I left the salon. On my newly created coiffure.

I'm tempted not to even mention having also cracked a tooth, and not being able to get through to my dentist, let alone not get an appointment.

Ah well, tomorrow's another day.

The mysterious case of the missing librarian ...

... or, where the heck have I been for the last month. That's an easy question to answer, although possibly not quite as easy to justify. In the never-ending battle to stay abreast with cyber-developments, I signed up with Facebook, uploaded pictures, commented on other stuff, and spent about 3 hours a day 'engaging'. [For those who haven't undertaken the Youth of Today's Social Networking Experience, read 'playing games'.]

After only 27 days, I can report that yes, it's addictive; yes, it sucks the life out of life; no, it has virtually no educational value; and no, it doesn't come anywhere near real-life 'socialisation'. Take for instance the Friends facility. Here you can ask people to be your friend, or they can ask you. But then you get little messages that say things like "6 of your friends hate you". Yeah, OK, maybe it isn't all that far removed from real life. Sort of makes you feel like George Bernard Shaw ... "he doesn't have any enemies, but his friends don't like him much".

There were many things that I didn't understand. For example, in the dedicated advertisement portion of each web page were 3 or 4 ads - with an extra little thougthful link to "more ads". I couldn't imagine why anyone would click on that link, except by accident. But sheesh! What would I know? I'm a Baby Boomer in a Gen Y world. Apparently.

On the other hand, I did find out a number of things about myself that I hadn't known before joining Facebook. I absolutely suck at games where getting money relies on the generosity of people you don't know, and who don't appreciate the gravity of the situtation. But wait! That IS just like real life. At least as far as financing the operations of a library.

Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible. I just want to reach Level 50 in Heroes and Villains before I log out for the final time. And I'mwaiting for a power pack for Dragons. Oh, and I have to find out why the daily income in Metropolis has fallen to $12/day ...

The Quietest Excursion Ever?

Friday was a stinker, weather wise, but traveling to the (NSW) State Library for the Australian launch of Room to Read was well worth the trip. The fact that some of Australia's top Young Adult authors got to hang out with me was a bonus ... or maybe it was the other way around.

For non-USA library folks, meet Susanne Gervay, Libby Hathorn, and Melina Marchetta (pictured above) with me. My latest coiffure was courtesy of the early morning start and the extreme heat.

Getting a free copy of John Wood's book (Leaving Microsoft to Change the World) wasn't any problem at all - it was included in the 'show bag'. Having him sign his book was also only a matter of lining up and waiting; I guess he's used to library folk closely supervising what he writes. After all, we don't want any scribbling, do we?

But the whole point of Room to Read is to support the establishment of school libraries in developing countries. Who knew that only US$15,000 was enough to build a whole school in Nepal? A handful of very small schools in my area did some fund raising, and were able to present a cheque for AUD$8,000. Even without the fluctuations in exchange rates, that's half a school already paid for.

The two students from my school that traveled with me on The Excursion also got a tour of the State Library. They were pretty much blown away not only by sheer volume (no pun intended); we descended down into the bowels of closed stacks, saw mammoth OldSystem catalog cards and cabinets (pre 1980 acquisitions, all undergoing entry into the LibraryManagementSystem); the Historical Records bit, etc. A big day.

Website of the Week: OneMotion

Talk about fun! (Yeah, OK ... actually have some fun, if you're allowed to). You can bounce the 'rappers' all over the floor; it's especially fun to drop them on their noses from the top at Breakdance.

Or if you're not that much into that type of diversion, you could also try playing with the spider. Not recommended for arachnophobes, but you grab it by the leg with your mouse and drag it around the screen. It's a lot more fun than it sounds. The right mouse click drops some insects for the spider to eat.

For the more sensitive and caring, OneMotion also offers The Drum Machine or a little snowstorm thingy for the more gentle reader.

Sydney: Holidaying at Home

And now, the Global Economy Crisis Strategy for Vacationing ... "homecationing". A week in one of the world's greatest cities, and without the expense (and drama) of overseas travel. Yes, we "did" Sydney.

For non-Oz readers and others who might be interested ... what did a family of 4 do, and at what cost? Stayed at the Meriton Kent, close to the heart of the CBD, in a 2 BR self-contained unit for AUS$160 per night. (Found via Wotif.com)

Amusements included the Star Wars exhibition (AUD$60 for family ticket) and Luna Park (free entry, pay for rides ... but with the McDonald's vouchers cost was $24 per kid for an Unlimited Ride Ticket). Travel around Sydney was AUD$10 for "Family Fun Day" ticket - all trains, buses and ferries.

Shopping? Paddy's Markets (open Saturday and Sunday) was 2 blocks away. A few good buys, but often cheaper in downtown stores - especially clothes. Don't miss dropping into Elizabeth's Bookshop. Well worth a detour (and no, I don't get a commission).

Eating out? Hotel was 10 metres from "the Spanish Quarter", two blocks from Chinatown, a leisurely stroll to Darling Harbour.

• Best Value meal was at "Mamma's Kitchen" (Italian) in Liverpool Street; total bill came to under AUD$80.
• Worst meal? "Capitan Torres" (Spanish); total bill was over $140 - which included a plate of bone and gristle that was supposed to be the house specialty, Suckling Pig. [After registering two complaints - once with the waiter, then again with the owner - they reduced the total bill by AUD$9.00.]
• Worst value? 4 x Burgers,4 x cola and 3 x chips at The Rocks; total cost AUD$78.00. Really.
• "Cold Rock" Ice cream x 2 was AUD$12.00, but well worth every cent - so I was told by the kids.
  

And being Sydney, lots of free stuff, sightseeing-wise at least - particularly around the harbour and Circular Key. Brilliant saxophonist near Customs' House; didgeridoo playing near the Museum of Modern Art (yes, Sydney has one of those too). Unfortunately the bagpipe player outside City Extra meant we changed our lunch plans for that day. Don't get me wrong, I really like bagpipes, particularly when the piper has a repertoire of more than three tunes.

Come, see, enjoy. And what's even better, for cheap!

Language Abuse: A sign of the times?

News reports of the last day or two have been bemoaning falling literacy standards throughout the country. Welcome to reality, Powers-That-Be. Yeah, we know you've been denying it for decades - but you won't believe the years of academically rigorous studies showing the potential for school libraries to impact positively on educational standards.

Why? Coz it's going to cost you money. Al told you years ago that you were all very good at defining your educational benchmarks, but that you need to also set resourcing benchmarks and do A Little Something about funding them. But wait! You started national testing in 2008. Brilliant!!! But then what?

Here's something interesting ... what does the sign photographed mean? I asked 3 high school students who were waiting for the doors to open. They all said "it means if you join up [as a Museum member], you can get in free". Sadly, no. It's $75 per year.

On the other hand, the Museum staff need to take some heat on this one. Where's the comma supposed to be? And shouldn't there be - at the very least - a semicolon after the word "today"? Ah. "What's a semicolon?". Indeed.

NYE in Sydney; with or without Paris Hilton

Been checking out webcams over the world; seems a bit weird that I was in Times Square only 11 weeks ago. But New Year in Sydney is something else again ... apart from the expected 1.5 million souls lining the Sydney Harbor foreshores for tonight's fireworks, Bondi Beach was as crowded as Hades must get the day after Overdue Notices go out 'n' all those lies get told about what happened to the missing/lost/but-I-brought-it-back stories.

Quite a few cases of sunburn and dehydration, according to the news reports. A relatively quiet NYE here at Warrior Librarian Central. Grouchman got an invite to the Paris Hilton NYE Party, so we won't be seeing him until tomorrow, so at least Warrior Librarian is represented there. I hope he remembers the list of questions I want him to ask The Paris. Geez, the world really must want to know what she's reading at the moment; who her fav. author is; her funny little library anecdotes.

But it's good to hear that The Paris Person has been propping up the Australian Economy; $20K on clothes within the first few hours of arriving here. Strange she's not staying at a Hilton hotel; I guess she must have checked out wotif.com and got the cheap rates. Just guessing on that one though ...

Is the proof in the pudding?

Can't speak about "the proof", but the sherry certainly wasn't in the Christmas trifle. It was in the chef. Best place for it, if I say so myself. Besides which, what with the left-over Tiramisu, Blueberry Cheesecake, enough turkey and ham to feed an army (although not quite enough for three growing teenagers, apparently) cooking here at Warrior Librarian Central can happily be suspended for at least a week.

Hope you all had a good one, too.

Bill Bryson's "Shakespeare"

Just finished reading Bill Bryson's "Shakespeare"; in some ways a disappointment, and in other ways an Interesting Read. Disappointment from the viewpoint that I was hoping for sheer escapism with chortling feel-good overtones. But for goodness sake, Bryson made me think. Again. I've been trying very hard not to do that. It's a hard habit to break.

There's the trademark Bryson Drollness throughout, but in the main 'tis a verily fine example of authentic research - with more than a mere suggestion of the need to Take Your Expectations Out of Their Paper Bag and Smash Them to Smithereens With a Very Heavy, Blunt Instrument.

TYEOTPBSTTSWVHBI; This is a new literary term that I've just coined - although conventional wisdom suggests it's not going to stand the test of time. Probably a bit long, and possibly a little too violent to get a PG13+ rating. You know how censorship is at the moment. And yes, despite the implied violence, it does lack punch.

Anyway, Bryson's book - as with any good research - does raise more questions than it answers. It was a surprise (at least to me) to find out that contemporary Thomas Heywood wrote or co-wrote more than five times the number of plays that Shakespeare wrote. So how come he didn't get his own Dewey number?

With his unique turn of phrase, Bryson variously describes Shakespeare's writing "as marked with a messy exuberance", "invigoratingly wayward", and parts that "defeat interpretation" by the experts. These are all virtues that will hearten Joe and Jane Blogger.

And isn't it great for the average semi-literate student of any age to find out that in the six surviving signatures of Shakespeare, he doesn't worry too much about spelling even his own name in any consistent way. Sheesh, the accepted spelling now in use isn't one that the writer himself ever used.

So here's a little homework for those replete with festive fare of all kinds. What the heck is meant by "swithald footed thrice the old, a nellthu night more and her nine fold". (King Lear) I've got a few interpretations of my own, but I think in this context it pretty much means I should sign off and go read something else.

Did someone mention "Bah, humbug"?

Maybe old Chuck Dickens was onto something back in 1843. With only 4 more sleeps until Santa (or the metric equivalent) arrives, anyone who's been near the stores could vouch for the distinct lack of Christmas spirit.

Sure, there's decorations galore; the charity wrappers are doing brisk business on behalf of the less fortunate; and the financial pundits spewing gloom and doom obviously haven't tried to get a parking spot within carting distance of any shopping mall.

But here's the down side. There's a cheery greeting at the check-out, but the faces of the shoppers tell tales tall and true of weariness, heartache, and sore feet. And that's just on the way into the main doors. The old 'drop shoulder' is making a come-back amongst those who haven't punted a ball for generations; elbows are getting a work-out beyond anything a pump class could achieve.

And just try to get a copy of the latest Stephanie Myer book either in a chain store or a book shop. Forget it. Everyone has sold out. If that isn't just the last straw ...
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Superheroes for Library Justice

Was just thinking that maybe it's time to update the poster, and not just because of the spelling mistake ...

So how's the new gig going?

Pretty good, and thanks for asking.  Although it couldn't be called - in the mythological sense - actual 'library Elysian Fields' (that would take at least two more zeros added to the end of the budget allocation), it's at least the holding pen to the field entry.  

Please forgive the AACR2-related pun.  

As the school year winds up, with only one more day to go before the 5 week break, the entire cataloguing backlog has now been cleared, with just a few problematic resources needing attention.  The annual library report is close to being finished; the major highlight is a three-fold increase in library borrowing.  Nice, but my work here is not yet done.  Geez, is it ever?!

Planning and resourcing is finished for next year's Library Orientation program.  If it wasn't so twee, I'd almost be tempted to publish it.  Let us all be thankful for small mercies.

The Shoestring Refurbishment has temporarily stalled, awaiting advice as to how much longer next year's shoestring might be.  And people say I'm not an optimist!

Rolling eyes skyward, again

Only a few months short of 10 years of 'administrating' the Casual and Relief School Library Staff Database, and finally got another Thank You. That would make around 5 of them altogether, over the years. Sheesh, all those nights spent slaving over a hot computer, without so much as a hint of expecting any payment (yeah, OK, I might have dropped a few hints about preferences in chocolate and/or flowers).

Mainly the comments have been more along the lines of "I sent you the information weeks ago", or " ...tell the person in charge ...". Good grief! It's almost enough to make me think about considering the possibility of introducing a fee. Luckily I'm basically too lazy to do that, for which the database folk (job seekers and vacancy fillers alike) should be extra grateful. Or at least less unpleasant.

I must be in a particularly narky mood tonight - probably something to do with the spectacular full moon on Friday. Apparently at the maximum thingy, being the closest to Planet Earth for years. And, as usual, it was cloudy here in Sydney. Bucketing with rain, actually.

Yep, The Heavens opened up, if not the clouds. Which then begs the question - can a cloud's silver lining be seen on a dark and stormy night?
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Did the canon fire its last shot? The demise of the Western Fiction genre

Does anyone read Zane Grey anymore? And who is writing in that genre? "Western Fiction" seems to have gone pretty much to Boot Hill, a very few notable movies excepted. Although there are the usual disparities in definition (Wiki and the well-known literary website Economic Expert, for example), the horses, trail-dust, and other commonalities are independent of the location.

Notably though, in Australia they should have been called "Easterns" or possibly "Northerns"; a Western here would involve a hell of a lot of water. (Western Australians should now feel free to write to your local newspaper editors and complain about bias and Geographism.)

To be honest, I didn't see any evidence in the library of The Western crawling away to die alone in a remote desert cave. The sad truth hit me during a scrap-booking expedition to find a background for an equestrian-themed page. There wasn't one piece of horsey wrapping paper to be had in any of the major retailers or dime stores; not one birthday card, not so much as a set of kids' stickers.

When did kids stop being obsessed with horses? Now that I think about it, even the Animal Stories shelves have accumulated more than the average amount of dust. Maybe it's just me, having grounded my youth around The Loan Ranger, Zorro, and later in life Bonanza and other things with horses in it, but now I wonder if the problems of contemporary youth have a foundation in a lack of equine contact and/or interest? As Will Rogers is credited with saying "The best thing for the inside of a man is the outside of a horse".
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